NEW DRUGS FOR WOMEN

In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also call Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin.

Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good old-fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them

NEW DRUGS FOR WOMEN

DAMNITOL

Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.

EMPTYNESTROGEN

Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.

ST. MOMMA'S WORT

Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.

PEPTOBIMBO

Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.

DUMBEROL

When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.

FLIPITOR

Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

MENICILLIN

Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person. "

BUYAGRA

Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping Increases potency, duration, and credit limit of spending spree.

JACKASSPIRIN

Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.

ANTI-TALKSIDENT

A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.

NAGAMENT

When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him.

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Al Davis of the Raiders VS himself

Al Davis is a clown better known in the following photo pairings :

Black Sabbath - Rat Salad

Holy cannolli, I never thought we would have a reason to talk about this obscure song from Black Sabbath. But Rat Salad is a hot topic in Dallas right now.
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I Know, I Know

Within the real estate industry, the current nomenclature assigned to a home with a three car garage is "garage a trois"

When selecting a custom telephone number, exclude the numbers 5 and 9 which sound more alike than any other two numbers.

Don't even bother trying to get your fax number and your phone number to be so close that people make the mistake of programming their fax machine to accidentally send faxes to your voice line or your cell phone. Make sure your fax number is very different.

There are no dumb questions, but there are a lot of inquisitive idiots.
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Kudos to Fujitsu

I write this mindless drivel from my original Fujitsu notebook, which had a hard drive failure a coupla months ago. Fry's replaced the HD free to me under the extended warranty plan that I paid for three years' coverage at $250. This is the second HD that was been replaced under that warranty plan... so far, I'm ahead in that area. Losing data makes the exchange more of a wash, in my books.

When I was called to p/u my repaired notebook, I drove to Fry's and brought it home and turned it on, and found the same problem was occurring. How could they have not checked the computer and found this??

The loaner that I was provided at Fry's Electronics.

So, back to Fry's it went and they immediately deduced that it was either the main memory or the mother board. That would mean a trip to the manufacturer for such a repair. It took Fry's in Campbell a full week to actually ship it to Fujitsu in Santa Clara. Really. I checked status with Fry's employees several times. After three weeks at Fujitsu for the motherboard and main memory swap-out, the notebook was returned to me and it finally effing works!!!
Canoe believe it??

The three lessons I learned from this experience :

1. Don't believe a thing that a Fry's employee says.

2. Don't believe anything that a Fry's employee says.

3. Believe nothing that a Fry's employee says.

Stund Bike Films - Best Of

This is worth watching.

Hit me back with something equal.

something old, Something Borrowed, something new

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

My mother taught me about the WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on, don't you think I know when you are cold?"

My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mowers cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids and I hope they turn out just like you!"

My mother taught me about PAIN.
"This is going to hurt me, more then it hurts you!"

Planning a road trip for the holidays?

I forgot to mention this.

Speedtrap dot org has a countrywide network of
reported locations of radar usage
by law enforcement officers.
Check it out.

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Pretty close to accurate

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PIT vs ATL on NFL Replay

If you missed it, this will be the Game of the Week, with added material - minus the fluff in between plays. A 3+ hour game is edited down to 1.5 hours. Sahweeeeeet!!

This is how I feel after that game :This is how I feel because I know the roster changes make a repeat of the 2004 season with a 15-1 record, and the 2005 SuperBowl-winning season nearly impossible:
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What else you got goin' on a Monday?

..::NWD7 Bay Area Video Premiere ENCORE Party::..

The all-ages encore showing of NWD7 in Berkeley at Blake's!
We still got some stuff gear to raffle out ... Azonic Fury Helmet, Gamut USA guides, Five Ten Shoes, Hella Greasy DVD's and more


When: Monday, October 23, 2006 doors open @ 6 PM.
Video Starts @ 7 PM.

Where: Blake's On Telegraph


Directions: Click HERE

Cantenna to the rescue

Ever been in your home or office with a weak cel signal? Hackers have been using this method to improve their WiFi signals, and it can be used to boost your cel signal as well. I'll update this post after I test it out for myself.
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Canon, Nikon, Sony, whatever

Just shoot it!

The new D80 digital SLR from Nikon has 10.2 megapixels and the street price is nearly 1300 with the 18-135mm 7.5x Zoom-AF Nikkor lens. 2.5" high-res LCD screen.
0.18 second start up and 80 millisecond shutter response with 3 frames per second. FAST.

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Santa Teresa / Stiles Ranch

Everyone has their favorite route on all the interconnected trails near IBM and Upper Santa Teresa Park. Here's another recipe.

@ Start at Almaden Lake (free to park),

@ take the sandy trail toward the hills along the uncovered creek,

@ transition over the bridge and begin following whippy singletrack along the Alamitos Creek,

@ continue stream and road crossings, left to Harry Rd., follow some asphalt,

@ Enter trail between IBM orchard and rancher's meadow, Love that hard left turn, then the concrete-reinforced dry stream crossing, traverse the foothill for a bit, then enter the trailhead log-crossing gate and (choose your uphill poison) follow through to the asphalt near IBM,

@ down/right on asphalt through S.T. Park entrance at the T-intersection on the right,
and left on the fireroad before Pueblo Picnic covered tables,

@ continue up the fireroad to the radio tower at Coyote Peak,

@ across and then down Rocky Ridge near the generator shack,

@ cross the stream and climb the fire road,

@ back to IBM road and loop back descending through the switchbacks near the shallow stone walls -- yielding to the occasional jogging Research Lab Scientist -- and on the return to Almaden Lake, weave the singletrack adjacent to Los Alamitos Creek and onto the multi-use trail when necessary.

Feeling froggy? Ride the ramps and drops built by the Rummys at the clearing in the trees.
Smells just like the old Frontier Village land creekside. Same foliage. Just a great ride.

When available, we take the Almaden horse trail to dodge the strollers, dog walkers and whitecaps.

Re-insert to civ life, play pickup Bocce ball next to the lake.
Self medicate. Whatever your thing is. Coffee, I dunno.

Has anyone else here logged miles cycling over and through the Native American caves [Bedrock in red spraypaint with the blue car door at the entrance!] at Almaden and Mazzone? The caves are now covered by a golf course? Sure, a lot of spray paint and broken bottles and paintballs tore up the place in the last 10 years, but, think of what history we had access to!

You gotta love the SantaTeresa-Almaden-Los Gatos-Saratoga part of this state.

Another link to another vid made by another person

But really innovative and worth watching.

This one is also innovative and worth it.

This one, not so much, unless you're a huge fan of The Clash.

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I left the .50 at home, but took a pair of 2.55s

Riding along the edge of the middle of nowhere I find myself asking why nobody has built homes here. Thousands of hilly acres with wildlife and serenity could gradually conceal the eradication of solitude found in this silent valley. A million residents could live here, if not for their creation of the world's longest double-file used car lot on Hwy 130.

In the distance, the spooky-white domes of the Lick Observatory pop above the hilltops in Seussian contrast to the sapphire crystal sky.

I'm nearly alone on this recently-graded trail of cocoa powder and spilled sacrete as no other bike racks were fitted to the seven cars in the lot by the lake. Ground squirrels and predatory birds whisping high above are my only companions during the constant climb. Cycling among the endless fields of flaxen foxtails after the summer's bleaching, the mind drifts to memories of fields of wheat, of sugar cane, of corn. In a blink, I return to the foxtails as a 300-pound black boar hears my approach and disappears over the next bend at 21mph.

Wow! My first live boar sighting in daylight - and a brazen lack of camo for this creature among foxtail acres. I continue climbing with increasing fervor in search of my mtn companion -- watching always for it's mate or it's young. Cresting another hill, I spot the boar once more, nibbling on the ground. I sneak over and capture some images. Two photos later the boar raises it's head and literally sniffs the air. "What's that awful smell?", she asks herself. "Ich. Smells like sweaty human!", and she tears off to the unseen. On the next rise, I see she is likely hiding in the shaded valley and greenery below and behind me now.

The park services have attached a storyboard to this house I find situated in the middle of nothing. Joseph Grant held title to the land where the Pala Seca Hunting Club once used a modest structure as their club's cabin for deer hunting and trout fishing trips. If you ask me, the extreme makeover begun in 2002 is stalled, but there's no threat of construction site theft, vandalism or graffitti/carving here. I begin to imagine the tales that originate from this spot reserved for the men to get away from their women.

The unfinished cabin is representative of 1920s scale, yet a castle in this blank landscape of brush, foxtails, and the occasional fence. A flushing toilet is said to have been added by Sierra Club Member J.D.Grant in advance of a presidential visit by his friend, Roosevelt. Stanford and Hoover are also said to have stayed at the Ranch House as guests of Grant - whose father earned his fortune selling supplies to gold miners.

Steep Downhill. Control Your Pee.
No matter where I'm riding, I always laugh when I see this clever mod of a common warning sign.

That continual climb from Grant Lake (1,600 feet) to Antler Point (2,850 feet) is bearable because of the continual descent that follows. I was grinning the whole time while the Weirwolf 2.55 LT treads provided confident traction, banking, berming and braking over gravel and cocoa dirt downhill sections up to 34 mph and down to 0 mph. Beyond that it's all a blur, as I was focused on controlling my pee so as not to soil my linens. Truth be told, I had a party to attend in 2 hours and positively could not risk any OTB.

Next stop, the Park's trails on the other side of Hwy 130.

The Ride:
Up Halls Valley - 2.1 miles One Way Only
Up Canada de Pala - .4 miles
Up Pala Seca - 2.3 miles
Down Canada de Pala - 2.7 miles
Down Los Huecos - 1.8 miles One Way Only
Add .8 miles to/from/around.

1250 - 1400 feet on a 10.2 mile circuit.

Santa, Pleeeeease?!?!?

Check this out.
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How do You want to live Your dash?

On your tombstone, your birth year is separated from your death year by a dash. That dash represents every single moment that occurs while you are living. So, you must answer the question : How do you want to live your dash?

Have you ever anagrammed your own name? It's definitely different.

You absolutely, positively MUST do whatever it takes to stay healthy. I've seen the future, and it is nothing without health.

I was listening to a woman from Spain, who was visiting the USA. She was describing this one difference between our peoples: In America, we work 55-60 hour weeks until we hit that magic number in age and we retire. Along the way, we take 2 weeks off for vacation during the summer. At the age of retirement, many of us cannot fully enjoy our freedom from work to travel because our health won't allow it. The Spaniards, however, take 10 weeks off each year and travel every year while they are healthy enough to do it 100%. I agree.
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(credit due goes to Tony Curtis Golden Retriever for the title.)

Helloween Fun

Get your fright on while the skeleton keeps you company.
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Pumpkin knowledge free on the 'net.
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Underwater pumpkin carving.
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I Know, I Know - Deux

You wouldn't ride a roller-coaster without the safety harness, so why do it in a car?


The layout of Kaiser Santa Teresa Hospital is as cryptic as most doctors' handwriting.


Once a cup of coffee became $3.00 all hell broke loose in franchised food industry pricing.


A $10. prime rib sandwich at Quizno's is a $6.00 steak sandwich they needed to Re-Name in order to make it profitable at $10.


Most elevators now have cell phone repeaters. Walk toward the elevator to get a signal in an otherwise "dead" building.


Jobs, homes, cars, friends all come and go. Family is for life.


Courtesy may not always be returned, but discourtesy surely will.


You don't have to floss all of your teeth.
Just the ones that you want to keep.


Sales is a constantly repeating job interview.


Your computer's hard drive will fail... Do you know when?... Backup daily while you floss.


Introducing somebody by their name only is no intro, my friend.
Jane Doe can be :
Jane Doe, my guitarist friend;
Jane Doe, who rescues dolphins;
Jane Doe, the stamp collector.

Remember that Jane Doe, alone,
is an anonymous woman without a life.
Please introduce your friends with life.
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Dem Bones

You might know that 5 weeks ago I broke the smallest of bones on the fingertip of my right middle --- and it was extremely frustrating not to be able to do anything normally. My left hand just hasn't been trained like my right hand. Well, boo hoo for me. It's fixed.





Friday, my mom broke her right elbow's funnybone (humerus).






What a pisser!

A broken elbow for your 71st birthday!

Awwww, hell.

My brother says she "needs to learn how to fall" after he watched her do the whole thing.


















Hate to see family in pain.

Weird year it's been.

You know what's worse than that?
The operating doctor is the head of the department and he did the first operation incorrectly and had to re-open the cuts and use different length screws for the three plates that were used to re-construct the broken pieces of bone.
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Uhhhh, help?

Is it fair to cry out for help in this situation? Saturday night I'm in Borders Bookstore at Santana Row, San Jose. Saturday night after dinner with my girlfriend and her 16-y.o. cousin. It's nearly 11:30. The announcement over the intercom gives Borders' customers 30 minutes to finish mising and ring it up at the register. I look around and see... people who are outside of the mating gene pool.

These people either already have families at home, or will never begin one by hanging at the bookstore on Saturday night. Seated individually, in clustered chairs, are Silicon Valley's finest. Each has a stack of books. Some have notebooks and coffee. Each are oblivious to the passings of other people --- a meter from their noses. Maybe a few are on business trips over the wknd? Maybe some are waiting for their mates in other departments on another floor inside the same store? Maybe, maybe, maybe.

I dunno. But, help me if you ever see me in a bookstore at 11:30 p.m. on a Saturday night. I'm too young for that shit.

Double Sessions for the Harvest Moon

Huh? 12% brighter for the Harvest Moon? Rode Santa Teresa today, then over to Alum Rock Park.

Here's the recipe:

Start at Almaden Lake (free to park), take the sandy trail toward Almaden following whippy singletrack along the Alamitos Creek, continute to Harry Rd., Enter trail between IBM orchard and rancher's meadow, up to the right at Stiles and the Mine Trail to the asphalt, down through upper S.T. Park entrance and left on the fireroad, continue to the radio tower at Coyote Peak, down Rocky Ridge, back to IBM road and loop back down through the switchbacks from the top and return to Almaden Lake, taking the singletrack adjacent to Los Alamitos Creek.

1:28 time
14.1 miles

Play Bocce ball facing west and the lake.
Self medicate. Whatever your thing is.

Loaded it all up into the truck and drive across the valley to A.R. Park. Cruised back to the last bridge that allows bikes. Tranq'd on the gurgling stream.

Rode to the top of Eagle Rock and watched the sunset through the shallow clouds on the horizon, admiring two new craftsman-style wood benches.
Repaired a goathead thorn flat in the rear - to complement the same in the front an hour earlier. (note to self : leave thorns in until end of ride)
Rode through all the speedy fireroads and tree-tunnel creekside singletrack and exited the park, back to the house.A great way to build endurance. Yes, a little lactic acid in between the two rides, but worth it. Embrace the pain. It reminds you that you're alive.

Take in the cacophany of stream, deer, fox, bobcat, coyote, squirrel, hawk, jay, crow, and turkey surrounding
The aromatherapy of blackberry, anise, bay, eucalyptus, oak, poison oak, foxtail, white birch, manzanita, juniper, maple, pine, and fall residential fireplace burn.

0:54 time
7.12 miles

Two goat's head thorns +4 more with the heads broken off.

Where Did That Little Blue House Go?

Where's that familiar little blue house downtown?
What behemoth has swallowed up the view?
Only Barry Swenson knows for certain.
And... some attorneys at 151 West Saint James Street.

Harvest Season is the Best Season

The orchids and the mexican sage are blooming.
The corn and the pumpkins have begun to arrive.
The first rainfall is packing the mountain bike trails.
I cannot wait for the snow to stay around Lake Tahoe.
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Oh, by the way. The first known death from spinach:

Flashlight Modifications

I recently found a website with parts and instructions and I built up a stunning modification of a 3D Maglite, based on the Welch-Allyn 1185 bulb rated at 9.6V. This light is commonly referred to as a Mag85. This bulb is the highest-rated output in lumens from Welch-Allyn. There are other bulbs being used in other modified lights, but this seems to be the current leader.

- I inserted a glass lens and a metal reflector to replace the stock plastic items which would melt with all the heat generated by this bulb.
- A 9AA-3D battery holder allows a person to insert 9 AA-sized NiMh rechargeable batteries and run them in series to obtain 10.8V and overdrive that bulb. With current draw and resistance, the total is reduced and the bulb never really sees that 10.8 anyway --- so there's no danger of killing the bulb.
- A high-temperature, low-resistance switch replaced the stock unit.- The key with batteries is to get either Eneloop or Duracell 2650 maH rechargeable NiMh cells. They hold an accurate charge and cycle well. The bottom line is a stock-looking Maglite 3D that puts out 817+ lumens, compared to the stock lumens rating of about 38. You can see a photo of the light output compared to another light here.

The attraction to the Maglite as a host is it's durability, low cost, and focusing beam. Occasionally, you can find a pre-built Mag85 for sale in the B/S/T forum. It's likely to be less expensive than mail-ordering all the parts from their different sources and then assembling everything yourself.

I've been reading and interacting with other forum members for several months, so... I'll answer any question you have about this -or other- lights.

Film Recommendation

I nominate : The Illusionist for film of the Fall season. Shot in Vienna, Austria during the horse and buggy days... a great film starring Jessica Biel, Paul Giammatti, Edward Norton, more.

All Day I Dream About .. .. ..

Remember in grade school when classmates would claim that Adidas stood for All Day I Dream About Sex? Maybe you never heard that one? I ordered and received the Adidas Hammer 06 Mountain/Touring Shoe for $95.00 from Bike Nashbar. Had an online coupon that paid for shipping.

These feel like great shoes. Gave them a 14mile trial yesterday.
Very comfortable.  The fabric has pores and feels like it will
breathe well. It also looks like it will clog with mud this winter.
We'll see.
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And Now, the Weather

Copied this from another site. Very useful.
Rode a circuit of trails and asphalt that I used to call Gatos Grand Prix. Start in Campbell on the Vasona trail through LG, into Jones and St. Joseph's. Return to start. Always a great route when rain arrives. It makes most people do something else. A few peds and cyclists. Stunning views with the sunlight occasionally piercing the clouds.
The slight rain is holding down the dust and making the trails a little tacky. Just enough without being slippery.

My Favorite Photographer Lately

I recently discovered Galen Rowell, a nature photographer. This man has been around for decades. I know, I know. Where have I been? Not hunting photographers, I imagine is the correct answer. Here's my recommendation: check on Amazon, then check on eBay for new books by this guy. Great bargains, as always.

WTB Weirwolf 2.55LT

This tire has very low profile knobs cut into segmented chevrons, giving it a faster roll and more grip. I'm running this tire F and R, as the sidewall says "Rear Rotation Optional".
I unsuccessfully tried to break traction while coasting down a gravel and sand hardpack trail and have huge confidence in this tire! Large volume provides a large contact patch and the ability to run lower pressures for technical climbs. On descents, I'm currently running about 40 PSI for this 220-lb. XC rider on a Superlight with King hubs and Bontrager Asym rims.

The WTB Weirwolf 2.55LT ranks right up there with the Maxxis Larsen TT 2.35K

Go get some and ride it like you stole it!!